April 2 – Therapy 2.0

252/365 – people to thank who have had an impact on me.  About 200 gratitude posts ago (wow, that’s a big number to comprehend), I showed appreciation for my therapist who got me through my separation, eventual move out on my own, and acceptance of my situation.  I saw her for a year and she acted as a sounding board and was very reflective in nature mirroring what I said (and needed) playing more of a life coach role.  This year, I decided to go back to therapy to now work on myself even further and delve into what makes me who I am.  I had the choice of seeing the same therapist but I decided that she was great at what she helped me with but I needed to find someone who might challenge me further.  This new therapist not only does that but she calls me on things which I was initially taken aback by but I have made huge strides in 5 sessions delving into my childhood and the absence of a father figure.  This therapist “S” also told me that her way may challenge me and it has – she stops me mid-sentence to have me feel the emotion associated with the words/thoughts that I am expressing which is something I rarely do.  She also has taught me how to give numerical value to all the emotions I feel and to also appreciate my own worth instead of looking for others’ approval/trying to win them over with my actions – something that I am totally guilty of and am now cognizant of.  Her therapy sessions are more than just talk at/with but involve the use of props, homework and readings with a big focus on my cognition and also approaching that little boy of 6 or 7 that saw a lot but did not understand it and decided to become the good boy to not disappoint anyone – now that’s what I call a breakthrough.  Getting in touch with the younger me has helped me to see how I became the me of today.  Thank you S for really challenging me to look into myself rather than just superficially at my actions.  I look forward to more sessions to really work on myself to become an even better version of me.

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